Remember when what I said about phases? Well, guess what, it's MY TURN! OMG, I've seen so many hot guys lately, I can't handle it anymore. My hormone level must be skyrocketing because every other thought is purely sexual. Hell, even I find myself saying hi to guys on the net, at the stores, on the streets...
I've even gotten myself a fetish, weird as it is. For instance, I work at a deli. Cute guys from OSU, amongst other places, come in all the time to get food. I even find myself fighting the other girls to server the hot boys. I noticed the other day that, when I'm handing my meat to them, I'm doing it in such a way that our hands touch. Then I gage the body heat of each person, warmer or cooler than mine, how erotic their touch makes me feel. Last Sunday, this really cute guy dressed mostly in black, came in. I served him and handed him my meat (sounds dirty, don't it) and our hands touched and lingered. I felt this wild tingly sensation all through my body and an unexpected flush of pleasure in my groin. WHOA, SO HOT!!!
Now I find myself back on the sites, cruising the pics, looking at the profiles, talking... Yes, me, talking, holding actual conversations that go above "stats", "you're hot", "do me now"... And, to me, these guys are GORGEOUS! I've even put myself on a couple of dating sites. On one, my "perfect" match, the man who is 100% on their scale, is 26 years old and great looking. Of course, getting him to chat is hard, but I'm working on it. I hear it now, "he's too young!" I'm hear to tell you all, bite me. If this works out, you all do not have the right to judge.
But, I do have a date almost set up for Saturday. Dude wanted me to come to his place in Marion for a dinner and movie, but I said no. Sorry, there are too many freaks out there. I'm not going all the way out to Marion, a place I've only been to once, to have dinner with a guy I do not know, and take the chance that I'm not going to BE the dinner. :) I think he's OK with him coming to Columbus for dinner and a movie, my treat, but I'm not sure. But, once again, here are my friends shouting, "28 is too young!" Once again, here's my cock, bite it!
Then there's this very HOT and TASTY guy on a hookup site I frequent. I've seen his picture before, and tried to initiate a conversation, only to have him disappear. No I found him and am getting some details out of him. Damn, but he's fine. We have some things in common, but, once again, he's 28. Still, he's on a hookup site, and I might be able to get him in the sack for some David-Time. Yeah, yeah, I know, I'm such a slut. BUT, remember how long it's been since I had any action? Me either, it's been that long.
SO, I decided that a night on the town is just what I need. I talk to my friend, Mr.Mark, and we're going out, hit the major spots, probably go to dancing, and pick up 2 boys for us. One for me and him and one for his sexy-hot roommate, Candice.
I'll be glad when I work through this sex phase. Of course, the only way to work through it is to actually WORK IT! How long do you need to go before you forget what you're doing? I know the motions, but that's the end part. I can't remember which parts to kiss, which get sucked, which get licked... Ooops, too much information. :)
Well, I'm off to drool over the boys, ragazzi!
Ci vediamo
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
Totally Hiralrious
OK, just so ya know, I work with this woman whom I shall call GrannyC. Now, GrannyC is an extremely nice, but exceptionally horny, woman. But, as the name implies, she's somewhat older than me, in her 50s. GrannyC knows I'm gay and doesn't give a damn. Neither does it stop her from trying to get me into the sack.
For some reason, probably at my instigation (I don't recall), the conversation drifted to sex. Ah, such a loverly topic. However, were we talking about gay sex (of which I am a master)? No. Were we talking about breeder sex, of which I've seen on cheesey porn and read about? No. We're talking about lesbian sex! GAH, like any of us there have a clue.
GrannyC just couldn't understand what lesbians do for sex. I just said they have their mouths, teeth, fingers, and ever present toys. She laughed and asked, "Really?"
"You got your dildo, if one just wants to give her partner something whilst they make out. Then hey have strap-ons, which can be used if one wants to hump the other. Then they have two-way strap-ons, which is used if they want to hump each other. Then, of course, some of them vibrate."
OMG, everyone laughed their collected asses off. Then I said, "For us gay boys, when both of us want to bottom, we have our own two ways." At the blanks looks, I continued, "It's a rod with a penis type thing on both ends. First, insert one end into the first guy, then other lines himself up and backs onto the other end. If necessary, flip the switch for the vibrator and enjoy."
Geez, I need a boy. Better yet, I need a vibrator. Never heard of a boy with a vibrating penis, have you? If you have, lemme know. Hell, I'll even pay for... Nah!
Well, GrannyC and the other ladies were rolling. The only way things coulda been funnier is if I had an orgasm from laughter.
Then, GrannyC says, "Well, hell, if they use a strap-on, why don't they get themselves a man and use the real thing."
Ah, gay boy to the rescue. "It's like this, except in reverse. I want a hole to stick my rod in (or have someone's rod in my hole, whatev). While your hole might do (pointing to GrannyC) I don't want what goes with it: soft skin, curves, breasts, and all that shyt that makes you a woman. I want hair, muscles, coarse skin, the musky scent of his sweat, the feel of his beard on me as he nibbles my..." Ok, you get the picture.
I think I satisfied the ladies on what lesbians do in the sack, and I satisfied my funny bone (I said bone, he he he). Now, if I could just get a man/boi to date me, I could have real stories to tell them of what happened the night before. Mmmm, the stories I could tell. Wait, I've already told them!
Ciao ragazzi, sweet dreams.
For some reason, probably at my instigation (I don't recall), the conversation drifted to sex. Ah, such a loverly topic. However, were we talking about gay sex (of which I am a master)? No. Were we talking about breeder sex, of which I've seen on cheesey porn and read about? No. We're talking about lesbian sex! GAH, like any of us there have a clue.
GrannyC just couldn't understand what lesbians do for sex. I just said they have their mouths, teeth, fingers, and ever present toys. She laughed and asked, "Really?"
"You got your dildo, if one just wants to give her partner something whilst they make out. Then hey have strap-ons, which can be used if one wants to hump the other. Then they have two-way strap-ons, which is used if they want to hump each other. Then, of course, some of them vibrate."
OMG, everyone laughed their collected asses off. Then I said, "For us gay boys, when both of us want to bottom, we have our own two ways." At the blanks looks, I continued, "It's a rod with a penis type thing on both ends. First, insert one end into the first guy, then other lines himself up and backs onto the other end. If necessary, flip the switch for the vibrator and enjoy."
Geez, I need a boy. Better yet, I need a vibrator. Never heard of a boy with a vibrating penis, have you? If you have, lemme know. Hell, I'll even pay for... Nah!
Well, GrannyC and the other ladies were rolling. The only way things coulda been funnier is if I had an orgasm from laughter.
Then, GrannyC says, "Well, hell, if they use a strap-on, why don't they get themselves a man and use the real thing."
Ah, gay boy to the rescue. "It's like this, except in reverse. I want a hole to stick my rod in (or have someone's rod in my hole, whatev). While your hole might do (pointing to GrannyC) I don't want what goes with it: soft skin, curves, breasts, and all that shyt that makes you a woman. I want hair, muscles, coarse skin, the musky scent of his sweat, the feel of his beard on me as he nibbles my..." Ok, you get the picture.
I think I satisfied the ladies on what lesbians do in the sack, and I satisfied my funny bone (I said bone, he he he). Now, if I could just get a man/boi to date me, I could have real stories to tell them of what happened the night before. Mmmm, the stories I could tell. Wait, I've already told them!
Ciao ragazzi, sweet dreams.
Sunday, March 16, 2008
Phases
OK, I know I've been away, but this gay boy has been trying to date again. Unfortunately, I keep failing. It's either I do NOT get the date, the date doesn't show up, or there is no 2d date. Tell me, people, am I so fucking ugly that guys think I'm some kind of troll just looking for sex? I mean, not that sex wouldn't be bad, but I am trying to date guys my age (against my own judgment).
Speaking of sex, I either need to get more or start jacking off more frequently. I'm going to be honest and very frank about this (not like I never have been in the past). I was watching this particularly tasty piece of internet porn this morning. The usual happened: clothes off, masturbation, etc. When the orgasm hit, WOW! I haven't felt that good since... Well I don't know when. Totally intense.
But, I digress.
As I was saying, I'm trying to date. I use various online sites since I have few friends to help me and I don't hit the bars/clubs like I used to. Not because I'm getting old, but because cash flow is limited. Anyhoo, I go through weeks of nothing then BAM, I feel like I'm the hottest stud on the net. I got guys of all ages, races, builds, lengths, ecc. after me. I really wish I was the whore I make myself out to be, because I would have no lack of booty calls.
Then again, I was painfully reminded of what being a whore can do to you. A friend of mine, whom no one knows, told me the other day that he tested HIV+ in early January. Not only could he not tell me how long he'd been positive, he had no clue who infected him. C'mon, people! Unsafe sex is like Russian Roulette! While the percentage of gay men who have HIV is significantly lower that the number who don't, do you really want to take that chance? All it takes is 1 out of 100 and you've gotten a life sentence that can NOT receive parole!
Again, I digress.
I have talked to sever men online, flirted with them, traded the pics, ecc. I finally asked one of them out on a coffee date. Of course, he doesn't live in the area, so the next time he comes to Columbus, with enough notice, we'll meet. He thinks I'm good looking, and I know for a fact that he is. 'Scuse me whilst I wipe away the drool. Anyway, I hope it's soon and I hope it works out. Not that there's anything wrong with being single, but I just miss the feel of a warm body at night, someone to talk to, to care about, and who is NOT family. Don't get me wrong, I love my family, RatBoy most of all, but...
SO, I'm back, I'm blogging, and I'm feeling especially randy. Don't be surprised if new blogs of the most tasty nature begin to appear. If they don't, that just means I'm busy trying to get stuff that'll drive you mad! LMAO
Anyway, here's another test thingy i did:
dream boyfriend
Take the quiz:
What will your dream boyfriend be like?
Your dream boyfriend will be a surfer. He'll be tanned, toned and laid back. This outdoorsy type is free spirited and lets it all hang out. His passion for surfing keeps him in perfect shape for riding the waves, or riding you!
Quiz by JustGuys.net - Find Hot Guys. Take the quiz
OK, considering the types of guy I tend to fall for, this picture says it ALL!
Speaking of sex, I either need to get more or start jacking off more frequently. I'm going to be honest and very frank about this (not like I never have been in the past). I was watching this particularly tasty piece of internet porn this morning. The usual happened: clothes off, masturbation, etc. When the orgasm hit, WOW! I haven't felt that good since... Well I don't know when. Totally intense.
But, I digress.
As I was saying, I'm trying to date. I use various online sites since I have few friends to help me and I don't hit the bars/clubs like I used to. Not because I'm getting old, but because cash flow is limited. Anyhoo, I go through weeks of nothing then BAM, I feel like I'm the hottest stud on the net. I got guys of all ages, races, builds, lengths, ecc. after me. I really wish I was the whore I make myself out to be, because I would have no lack of booty calls.
Then again, I was painfully reminded of what being a whore can do to you. A friend of mine, whom no one knows, told me the other day that he tested HIV+ in early January. Not only could he not tell me how long he'd been positive, he had no clue who infected him. C'mon, people! Unsafe sex is like Russian Roulette! While the percentage of gay men who have HIV is significantly lower that the number who don't, do you really want to take that chance? All it takes is 1 out of 100 and you've gotten a life sentence that can NOT receive parole!
Again, I digress.
I have talked to sever men online, flirted with them, traded the pics, ecc. I finally asked one of them out on a coffee date. Of course, he doesn't live in the area, so the next time he comes to Columbus, with enough notice, we'll meet. He thinks I'm good looking, and I know for a fact that he is. 'Scuse me whilst I wipe away the drool. Anyway, I hope it's soon and I hope it works out. Not that there's anything wrong with being single, but I just miss the feel of a warm body at night, someone to talk to, to care about, and who is NOT family. Don't get me wrong, I love my family, RatBoy most of all, but...
SO, I'm back, I'm blogging, and I'm feeling especially randy. Don't be surprised if new blogs of the most tasty nature begin to appear. If they don't, that just means I'm busy trying to get stuff that'll drive you mad! LMAO
Anyway, here's another test thingy i did:
dream boyfriend
What will your dream boyfriend be like?
Your dream boyfriend will be a surfer. He'll be tanned, toned and laid back. This outdoorsy type is free spirited and lets it all hang out. His passion for surfing keeps him in perfect shape for riding the waves, or riding you!
Quiz by JustGuys.net - Find Hot Guys. Take the quiz
OK, considering the types of guy I tend to fall for, this picture says it ALL!
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